THE PROCESS OF CHANGE

When people walk into a mental health professional’s office (be it a psychotherapist, psychologist, counselor, or hypnotherapist), they are seeking change in their personal or professional life.

Also, even though they may have a desire to break habits such as smoking, addictions, overeating, anorexia, anger, fear or need relationship help, more often than not their issues may be more ‘emotion-based’.

This means that while the mental health professional is busy working on helping with a client or patient's weight loss, an eating disorder, or depression, there is usually an underlying culprit for these conditions that is hiding behind the scene. If these emotions are not handled or at least discussed, the mental health provider may be ‘barking up the wrong tree,’ and ultimately the client or patient may walk away saying that ‘therapy’ or ‘hypnosis’ doesn’t work.

We are not all created equal – what may mentally, emotionally or physically affect one person may not affect another or at least not in a similar way. Some people are more sensitive than others whether through genetics or they have been made that way by social factors – parents, guardians, peers, colleagues, intimate relationships or the person’s own personality or proclivities. Some people are so emotional that just getting them to think and operate logically is a challenge, and to guide them towards functioning consistently can be like pulling teeth.

This work in The Process of Change is not only left up to the mental health provider. Much of the responsibility of change lies with the client, and the first thing this individual must do to change is precisely to ‘embrace change’. This is so important, so I will say it again. The first thing a person must do in order to change is to ‘embrace change’. This means that the client must make a conscious decision and then put forth effort to change and also to maintain the positive results of the change until it all becomes second nature – which is the ultimate goal.

I have heard and seen clients go into different therapists’ offices and later come into my office with the idea of ‘change me’ and ‘change me’ today—without ever giving much thought that the onus of this change, at least in part, relies on them. Yes, the therapist has many tools in his or her tool belt to bring about change for his clients. But at the end of the day, again, the client must be willing to change or at least make the necessary adjustments in his or her life just as much, perhaps even more so, as the therapist wants to help make the change in the client’s life.

This concept is similar to a football coach giving a play on the sideline to his quarterback for execution. The coach may draw up the plan, advise the best way to run the plan, even give a plan ‘B’ if plan ‘A’ doesn’t work; but after is all said and done, it is up to the quarterback to make it happen on the field.

When I hear about some people who have been in therapy for 10, 20 or more years for the same issue, it makes me wonder if the client is not ‘embracing change’ or if there should be a ‘change’ in the therapist who is working with them.

Without ‘embracing change’, we are left holding ‘a bag from the negative past’. Yes, I know, change doesn’t come easy. How do I change a ‘feeling’ or ‘behavior’ I have carried around with me for years – maybe even since childhood or my teen years? Facing the ‘unknown’, even if the ‘unknown’ is good for us is a difficult task – it is uncomfortable. Holding on to a ‘known thought, behavior or mindset’ even if the ‘known thought, behavior or mindset’ is negative may be ‘comfortable’ for us because it is all we know.

The first thing you must do to ‘embrace change’ is to strongly dislike your ‘comfort zone,’ especially if this ‘comfort zone’ promotes a negative lifestyle, causes you depression, arguments in your relationship(s), health problems, has you living in the past, brings setbacks to your world, or even destroys or limits your quality of life. The second thing you must do is to put aside your stubbornness or unwillingness to do things differently – hard-headedness will prevent change from happening. Having an ‘I am right, they are all wrong mindset’ doesn’t help. Third, if you find a good therapist, please listen to the advice, take it to heart and implement it in your life. And fourth, bring fun into your world. Find something that brings you happiness – a hobby, art, music or discover your creativity or something new about yourself; join social groups or anything that will make life lighter and take your mind off the negative. If you look for negativity in any part of life, you will find it; just as if you look for the positive in life, you will find it as well.

Once you religiously follow these steps, concrete, effective change is around the corner.


John
Clinical Hypnotherapist & Life Coach
Hypnosis & Self-Enhancement Books & CDs: http://www.hypnotizeanybody.com
Hypnotherapy Services: http://www.hypnotherapy4health.com
Joimethod: http://www.joimethod.com

HYPNOSIS AND GOD

Sometimes I receive calls from potential clients who are active in their religious community (primarily, but not exclusively, of the Christian and, to a lesser extent, Muslim persuasions). The main question these people had for me related to the fact that they wanted to know if God would approve of hypnotherapy.

They would go on to tell me about all of the negative things they had heard about hypnosis from the church… things such as: it is associated with devil worshipping or witchcraft and if you allow someone to “play” with your mind, you may be inviting demons to reside inside you. They would also say that their pastors would not approve of hypnosis or that hypnosis is not mentioned in the Bible.

I even had some clients come and tell me that they visited their pastors before contacting me and talked to him about it. I was amazed, just as much as the clients themselves, at the response they received. When they would tell their pastor that they were considering hypnotherapy for their personal issues, they either received a reaction of laughter, a near chastisement, or a berating of hypnosis. One response none of my clients received from their pastors is something like: “How can this hypnotist help you overcome your problems? What did he say he could do for you?” So even though the pastor warned them against hypnosis, he didn’t provide any solutions. And here’s the way all of this sounded to me: it was like watching a person have a heart attack on the street, and simply standing there, watching, without making a move to call an ambulance.

Yes, there may be many myths about hypnosis and how it has sometimes the practice of it has been abused (e.g., the antics of stage hypnosis, a Svengali type of hypnosis as portrayed in movies and NLP or Neuro-Linguistic Programming in television commercials). These are actions you or I may not approve of, but one cannot defame hypnosis and, for example, ignore the mishaps of members of other professions. Our news is full of stories of doctors charged with malpractice for giving the wrong medication and/or ordering the wrong procedure; teachers abusing their students, corrupt police officers who were sworn in to serve and protect the community and instead indulge in corruption, brutality and abuse of power; and pastors and priests accused of defrauding their flock, or committing infidelity and/or pedophilia. Does this mean that we should condemn all of the members of these professions because of a few bad apples?

I don’t profess to have a direct phone line to God or pretend to know all of the answers in regards to what he wants us to do every minute of every day – but I can say that after analyzing some of his creations, such as humanity in the form of man and woman, I have formed my own conclusions.

Since man has been (and is) walking around with a piece of high tech equipment (his brain) on his shoulders that is great enough to build computers, cars, airplanes, large skyscrapers, furniture, iron and concrete bridges, and the very churches and mosques in which Christians and Muslims pray, I would suspect that God would want us to understand his creation much more than we actually do.

Without understanding the capabilities of the brain and the nature of emotions, our prisons, drug rehabilitation centers and mental institutions will continue to fill up with destructive, fragile and confused men and women. As I said before, I am not an expert on God’s thinking but I would suspect that he wouldn’t want to see his creations go to waste with negative thinking and poisonous emotions. Yes, praying is a blessing which would certainly help a person in need. But to paraphrase an old biblical saying: “You can give a man a fish and he will eat for one day but if you teach him how to fish (in this case, teach him how his mind and emotions work), he will eat for a lifetime.” Also: “God will help you if you help yourself”. Any of this sounds familiar?

These clients who sought help from their pastors first and were denied came to me for hypnotherapy sessions in the end and they told me afterwards they were happy they did. My method involved the simultaneous use of multiple techniques, such as behavior modification, coaching/mentoring, career and personal advice for the conscious mind and hypnosis for the subconscious mind to affect both sides of the brain – the left, which represents logic, and the right, which is the seat of emotions. I help my clients move themselves out of their own way which is often their biggest issue.

Hypnotherapy is not here to replace the Bible, the Quran, the Torah, the pastor or priest, or to take away anyone’s self control. It is designed to allow a man or a woman to take charge of their life by embracing logic, balancing life, and accepting who they are; thus, getting in control of their “self” instead of letting the mind and emotions control their life. In my humble opinion, this will allow any person to appreciate God’s gifts to them!





John
Clinical Hypnotherapist & Life Coach
Hypnosis & Self-Enhancement Books & CDs: http://www.hypnotizeanybody.com
Hypnotherapy Services: http://www.hypnotherapy4health.com
Joimethod: http://www.joimethod.com

CAREER OPTIONS

With the economy being as depressed as it is today, job hunting may present challenges for career seekers. Finding a good paying job or a promising career is like searching for quick silver – it is very hard to acquire and harder to maintain.

It saddens me to hear about out-of-work professionals who struggle just to make ends meet. Layoffs through mergers and acquisitions, job attrition or doing more with less, as well as positions moving overseas and corporate greed and corruption have taken their toll on our economy. Many people, some of my clients included, often wonder where to turn for their next pay check.

With the many years experience some may have garnered over time, it just may pay off to strike out on their own as an entrepreneur or seek a new market altogether; constantly beating the pavement littering the same tired market with résumés and applications can become depressing.

Yes, I know what you may say: “I have invested so much time and effort into this industry; I wouldn’t know where or how to start over”. In answer, I would say to that: if your job experience is not currently paying off for you, it may be time to move on to greener pastures.

Others may say, “But I only have skill in one area”. I would say to that: it may be time to think about searching for a different field. Sometimes an industry can change causing opportunities in a certain field or occupation to ‘dry up’ whereas such areas may have been profitable in the past. The car manufacturers, such as General Motors and Ford Motors, come to mind. Because of the subprime loans, the real estate industry, in certain states, is another market that is also seeing many challenges.

One thing to keep in mind is: The only constant in life is change! If your economy, environment, or job market change, I say that it is time for you to change as well.

Do your research and find out what’s going on in the various industries in your locale. If you seek to provide a service, in other words, start your own business, do your homework well in this area.

If you are blessed enough to have financial support from a spouse, mate, family member or friend, take this opportunity to update your skills. You may have to do something that you aren’t necessarily in love with just to make a living.

From experience and observation, I have noticed that there are three occupational areas that, it appears, can withstand the tests of time – education, health care, and security. No matter the state of the economy, jobs in these areas are always needed in one form or another. You may not receive a six figure salary starting out but they can provide consistent income; oftentimes that is all required just to put food on the table. This is by no means intended to be a comprehensive list, and I’m sure there are other types of occupations that can prove consistently lucrative. However, one has to start somewhere. The important thing is not to lose hope.

Here are two useful links I thought to share:

http://www.thejobmarket.org/jobseekers/choose_steps.asp

http://hotjobs.yahoo.com/career-articles-6_signs_your_job_may_be_in_jeopardy-371


John
Clinical Hypnotherapist & Life Coach
Hypnosis & Self-Enhancement Books & CDs: http://www.hypnotizeanybody.com
Hypnotherapy Services: http://www.hypnotherapy4health.com
Joimethod: http://www.joimethod.com

Side effects of Hypnosis?

Headaches, stomach aches, nose bleeds, insomnia, frequent urination, high blood pressure, diabetes, and a host of other side affects are what you may hear at the end of a pharmaceutical advertisement on television. There’s a voice which quickly lists all these ailments—like an auctioneer who takes the bids in an auction—as if they don’t really want you to really hear it. By the end of it all, you are dazed and confused. These medications’ side affects are so numerous and intrusive, it makes me wonder who would ever take a drug after hearing THAT kind of roll! Phew! Gives me a headache just listening to it, if you ask me.

I would imagine that doctors have a difficult time explaining the side effects of a particular medication to patients because they are so numerous. Then again, they may not think much of it because they’re trained to do it. Of course, when people need healing, they would pretty much do whatever it takes to achieve better health in spite of the possibility of numerous after effects. They may take a similar position to: “yes, I know there may be at least five side effects in taking this medication to relive my arthritis, but if my pain is lessened, I will tolerate these other ailments.”

Occasionally, I receive calls from people asking me about the side effects of hypnosis. These potential clients want to know what type of problems they may come across once they undergo hypnotherapy. Initially, when I first started my practice, I used to tell them—and I would say this proudly—that hypnosis has no side effects. I would go on to say that if one is hypnotized to increase self-confidence, for example, one will only eventually experience a change to reflect the results they are looking for, that is, an increase in confidence. Nothing else.

Today, after many years of practice and feedback from my clients, I had to change my opinion on how I view hypnosis and its possible side effects.

My clients have come to me for many different reasons and in the process they have discovered added value, as an after effect, in different areas of their lives they never imagined possible.

For example, I had a client who wanted to increase his stage performance. I helped him with his self-confidence and enhanced his “persona” on stage which added to his self-value – in the process, he also let go of the habit of smoking marijuana, because that was one of the things he used to hide himself behind. Smoking marijuana made him feel less disappointment about his lack of self-image. After we worked together during our sessions, he found he did not need that particular tool anymore. He had everything he needed right inside of him.

Another time I worked with a client who was having relationship issues with her husband. After we ironed out these issues, her level of self-confidence increased as a result and she began taking classes, received a certification and made her own living instead of only relying on her husband’s salary.
I worked with yet another client on her self-esteem issues (yes, lack of self-esteem is a HUGE problem that affects many people and stunts their growth). After we got her esteem to a healthy level, she bought a new home, new car and opened a clothing boutique.

In another case, I worked with a client to help him sort out his life – it was topsy-turvy and he couldn’t make heads or tails of it. After he received clarity in his life, he started a new job in a new town where he always wanted to live.

There are many more stories like this but to prevent from boring you, I will move on and wrap up. Hypnosis does have side effects, yes—but they are all positive! So if you are one of those who are concerned about this, you now have your answer – you can go into a hypnosis session with one goal in mind and leave with much more!


John
Clinical Hypnotherapist & Life Coach
Hypnosis & Self-Enhancement Books & CDs: http://www.hypnotizeanybody.com
Hypnotherapy Services: http://www.hypnotherapy4health.com
Joimethod: http://www.joimethod.com